I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

 

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to  buy a replacement.

 

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird.  Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

 

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

 

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called ‘labor!’