Men would do a much better job of searching for and clipping coupons.

Hookers are renamed "Special Stock Girls."

If you ever were not "prepared", you could always go to Aisle 8

There's gonna be confusion over Trix on Aisle 3 and "Tricks" on Aisle 10.

Clean up on Aisle 10 would take on a whole new meaning.

Same with the phrase "Freshness Dating."

The term "use by" will have a new meaning.

Same with "Buy One, Get One Free."

Darn few would want to win the One Millionth Shopper award.

Paper or Plastic or Rubber?

Sadly most men would still be in the Express Lane